Totality in Being with What is.

Musings from November 13th 2015.

Like everyone else with a tv or a computer I was watching the news in the early hours of Nov 13thhorrified by the events in Paris…pretty soon I found myself writing in response to this event but something about what I was writing did not feel real. I felt it was a reaction, a need to respond and at the same time I stayed my hand.………..wait, listen, feel digest. Take time.This morning I feel to share the unfoldment that happened in the next few hours.

I have heard the news, seen the footage, read the internet posts and I was pissed, angry …INTOLERANT…and I also felt a kind of disgust at the level of bigotry that main stream pours out like vomit! What about Beirut and Syria and Palestine and all the other places that are suffering daily!

Over the years the one thing that I feel deep in my cells is that ‘There Is Nobody Outside” So here I am totally in the experience. I am resonating and raging at the stupidity and futility of it all!  It would be so easy to move out of here with all my psycho-spiritual knowledge, move away from these sensations, get on my spiritual high heels and reject this and rise above it, the inner judge with all his superiority would love that but this is the deeper movement inside. I breathe…

This is what I need to make space for and allow.

In this moment I am the perfect mirror for the INTOLERANCE in the world… I feel so many of my keys activated right now and they are not all in shadow, the co-existent nature of life flows through.

Recently I have had a couple of student/teacher/friends ask me… “What does it mean ‘to be with what is?”  Or “What do you mean when you say ‘sit in’?”

It takes some stillness and inner listening to get to the core of the experience in the moment. It would have been so easy to just write something in response to the situation in Paris. Something heart-full and touching which I also felt in the moment but I have these little mouse whiskers that are a gift from the 13th Gene Key and they were twitching, keeping me alert, listening to something moving underground in the layers of sensations in the body. It had not arrived in any mental way, no words, it was a feeling, a sensation, deeper in the core. I notice that my diaphragm is constricted, my throat tight.  There is contraction in the facial muscles, fascia and cranial sutures they are not receiving their full quota of oxygen. They are frozen in the face of this trauma!  I am outraged!  This is my human family, what the hell is wrong with you?  It is painful to continue to experience this wounding, painful that the victim and victimizer archetypes are so strong and worse that these incidents play out in a way that justifies more trauma, more abuse, more terror around the world created from hidden agendas.

There is no transparency here!

I am angry and intolerant, grrrrrr, but is I connect more deeply inside the tears start to flow, the anger subsides and I feel the wounds as the inner military that guards the heart makes way for some softer feelings. The belly relaxes, the solar plexus opens up, the breath flows more freely and the hurt is released in this allowing.

I am not separate from this experience.

I see that I am intolerant, intolerant of what I consider is a lack of intelligence. It is simply not intelligent to kill each other, to cause each other harm, based on some ideology that is not even true! I am intolerant of the greed and agendas, intolerant of a need for power at the expense of others! I am intolerant of religions and piety dressed up as righteousness!  I am extremely intolerant of the ‘cause a problem to solve a problem’ approach that continues to work.  I am intolerant of the justification to further destabilize the Middle-East,which in turn has a destabilizing effect on the whole planet.  I am intolerant of a media that makes the Muslim world the scapegoat! It is such a classic family system agenda!


I am intolerant that so many people do not see this!

Intolerant that the history of how this all happens is ignored!

I am the perfect mirror of intolerance!

I am also an extremist! I am extreme in my need to find the inner truth. I am extreme in the knowing, that love, truth, freedom, forgiveness, compassion, respect and dignity for all is the only way!

Throughout this inner journey that I share with you,allowing the intensity to wash through my body, I breathe and watch, slow conscious breaths, gentle support for this little body form that is rocked by the atrocities of the world on a daily basis, they are personal.

It hurts my heart to see the planet being trashed by fracking and animals being tortured for no reason that I can understand. I feel helpless and I breathe and my heart opens and expands as more truth arises and stability returns to my system.

I am an extremist, I am extreme in allowing, accepting, opening, breathing.

Life is always in its perfection even though I do not understand. I am extreme in letting go, acceptance, compassion flows.

My contribution is also perfect in every moment no matter what it is.

Love and peace flow, the endocrine system is once more filled with the breath of life, chakras and meridians filling the organs and tissue with the presence of life .

It may be true that as a humanity we are at the parting of the ways, who am I to think that everyone is here to wake up!  Who am I to think one state of being is better than another? Gratitude arises as I see the perfection of the teaching in every situation.  There are Angels all around. …some dressed in shadows.

Existence is experiencing herself I can only experience how she moves through this being called me. Breathing, gentle, relaxing.

In openness the flow returns again to spaciousness, no thoughts, Peace.

Dr David Hawkins wrote a great book in the early 90’s called Power vs Force. In that book he offered his ‘Map of Consciousness’ a simple way to look at the world. He used kinesiology as a way to show others how certain thoughts stressed the body. Also to show how certain beliefs also stressed the body.

Blind testing rooms full of people in the Southern States of the U.S.A many who considered themselves right wing were amazed to discover that when faced with

Pictures of Martin Luther King and others the muscle test showed no stress. When faced with pictures or words of Hitler, Stalin or Crocodiles the body showed stress.   Our cells Know!

Most of the planet is resonating in a way that continues to feed the shadows and some of us have committed to something more, spending our time embracing the shadows and opening to the gifts of the heart/mind and beyond into pure awareness.

He suggested that one individual resonating with Love is a counterbalance to 750,000 resonating in shadow.The numbers may or may not vary but essentially love brings balance.  Love is the glue and love heals.

I think of our days together in Romania as I write this, we have all been drawn together in this common love of Gene Keys a reason for many of us to travel across the world to join with our soul friends. 300 of usJ! I am so thankful for all of you. Many that I was able to spend time with and others that I could just view from afar and feel your smiles and taste your commitment to the voyage.

Venus was the reason for our gathering and I wonder if the purpose may be even more than we realise?

Who knows what balance our togetherness brought to the world.

Perhaps our days together have prevented even greater tragedy. I often feel I am like a honey bee, there is a reason for me to go somewhere and a purpose.

I wonder if the honey bee knows anything beyond collecting nectar?   Perhaps collecting nectar is its’ reason but I wonder if it knows anything about its’ purpose of pollination?

I am sure that we hear the inner call as a higher purpose of pollination. We are supporting ourselves/each other, the beloved calls to us, clearing the field, making way for consciousness to flow, opening the portals of love and truth and freedom, making it more available for others who may wish to step through. And like the honey bee I do not need to think of this,I just follow my beloved errant feet taking me to meetings and sharings with others who are pollinating the field with love.

So now…after all that…I going to have a croissant, a great cup of coffee and tonight a fine glass of wine to honour the exaltation of spirit/ the Joie De Vivre that I am sure is at the heart of all ParisiensJ:)

May we all continue to walk each other home.

In loving regard


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